Khan Tiki Mon and his Mai Kai waitress Jordan.
My Mai Kai waitress, Jordan, put a sparkler in my Special Reserve Daiquiri for my birthday.
The two lovely ladies in the photos above, seated at my table in the Tahitian room at the Mai Kai, are Marina and Kari. Kari is a photographer and writer for Tiki Magazine. I first met Kari, and her mother, at the Wreck Bar Friday. I confessed to Kari that one of my dreams was to someday have my humble little Tiki lounge featured in Tiki Magazine in the “Totally Tikified” section. I am not worthy yet but someday. I felt like I was seated with ‘Tiki royalty’. Awesome time.
One of my new friends this year John_O. A fellow poster on Tiki Central. West coast meets East coast. That’s a Black Magic I’m holding.
Mermaids sited at the Wreck Bar.
I got pulled out to dance in the Tahitian room by Kim. Kim was also playing the bongos. It turns out that Kim and her husband Blair are from my home town of Syracuse. They were there with Carol; who works at Burghardt’s Automotive where I take my cars for service. It’s a small world and now there are some Tiki secrets out in the open. Blair was one of the mixologists in Rum Barrell challenge that was judged by Jeff “Beachbum” Berry and his rum ‘Rat Pack’ on Friday night. I believe he came in third.
Pool at the Bahia Cabana.
The girl is on fire! Marina the Fire Eating Mermaid.
Cocktail contest with Jeff "Beachbum" Berry officiating.
Entrance to the Tiki Treasures Bazaar - located in the Bahia Mar.
The most exquisite Tiki mug I have ever seen. Outside my price range but worth every penny. The Mai Kai mystery bowl complete with Mystery Girl.
The crowds eagerly await the start of the mermaid show.
While I was waiting outside for Wreck Bar to open Marina came and told me that the bar had created cocktail in her honor that they were calling the ‘Fire Eating Mermaid’. She asked if I could work the crowd a little and promote the cocktail. She said she wanted to look into the bar from the pool and see everyone with the blue cocktail. I did what I could. There were a lot of blue cocktails in the bar.
The Tikiyaki Orchestra performing poolside.
Marina performing with the Tikiyaki Orchestra.
Master of ceremonies King Kukulele.
Khan Tiki Mon and Tiki-Kiliki. Tiki-Kiliki, aka Christie White, is the promoter of the Hukilau. This year is the tenth edition.
Chris, from the webisodes “Lost in Paradise”, is poolside at the Bahia Cabana scouting locations and camera angles for the upcoming shoot.The Bahia Beach Hotel pool.
View from the room at the Bahia Beach Hotel. You can see the intracoastal waterway.
Entrance to the Bahia Cabana - home of the Hukilau 2011 kick-off party.
The room was large with huge windows and lots of light.
Bahia Beach Hotel - my home away from home for Hukilau 2011.
Rum revolution
2011/06/13 09:00 On Sunday I headed back to the Mai Kai. The Mai Kai opened early for the Hukilau crowd. It was a chance to wander the Mai Kai behind the scenes as it were. I took a lot of pictures. The Molokai bar was open with limited appetizers available and I had a great time. I made some new friends, Brendan and Anna, who were actually married at the Mai Kai. How awesome is that?!
2011/06/12 12:00 On Saturday afternoon I traveled to the Mai Kai for Jeff “Beachbum” Berry’s ‘Rumposium’. Jeff Berry put together a “Rat Pack” of rum authorities to celebrate rum. You have to love a lecture where they give you a shot of Lemon Hart 151 rum when you sit down. I had never had Lemon Hart 151 before. Unlike Bacardi 151, which is only good for fuel (setting stuff on fire), the Lemon Hart 151 was actually quite nice as a sipping rum. I drank half the shot ‘neat’ and then floated the rest in my Mai Tai. We were able to order food and drinks during the lecture and I started with a Mai Tai and some delicious shrimp fried in a Tempura batter and rolled in rice noodles. Fabulous! The lecture was very interesting. I especially enjoyed Wayne Curtis; author of “And a Bottle of Rum: A History of the World in Ten Cocktails” (a book I need to read). I was fascinated by the history of the London Dock Rum; something I had never heard before. After the lecture I headed over to the Tahitian room where I spent most of the rest of the night.
2011/06/10 13:00 This morning I went back to the Bahia Mar for another go round at the “Tiki Treasures Bazaar”. I picked up a couple more prints and some pendants. I then stopped for lunch at the Bahia Cabana. I sat on the deck overlooking the marina. There was a really big boat that had a smaller boat tied to it. The smaller boat was to get from the shore to the really big boat and then back again. I was thinking that I probably couldn’t afford the little boat. It reminded me of Rodney Dangerfield in “Caddyshack” – “My dinghy is bigger than your whole boat!” There were six people in neat little blue uniforms on the big boat cleaning it. If you gave me the big boat I couldn’t afford to pay the six people in neat little blue uniforms to clean it. So, don’t anyone give me a big boat. The mermaid show at the Wreck Bar starts at six-thirty and I plan to get there early to get a good spot.
2011/06/11 09:00 The next thing I am going to write about pains me. I think to be honest and true I sometimes need to report on things that I am not proud of. I think I got roofied at the Wreck Bar. Either that or it was just a combination of little sleep, little to eat, and too much to drink but after the Mermaid show I went back to my hotel and laid down for a couple of minutes. The couple of minutes turned into a coma. I woke up having missed the Friday night main event. Crap! Today, at 11:30, I have the lecture and presentation “Beautiful Girls That Live Like Fish” presented by Vintage Roadside. It’s a history of the Aquarama attraction. That’s at the Bahia Mar and when that’s done I’m off to the Mai Kai for the “Rumposium” hosted by Jeff “Beachbum” Berry.
Beers at the Bahia Cabana.
2011/6/10 00:15 Awesome awesome night. One more extra awesome just about covers it. Wow! What a great time. After my late lunch early dinner, I went and checked out the Tiki Bazaar at the Bahia Mar. I bought 2 prints from Taboo Island. After that it was time for the festivities to begin. Poolside at the Bahia Cabana the Intoxicators were warming things up. I really enjoy the Intoxicators. It was a good show and it set the stage for the Tikiyaki Orchestra. The Tikiyaki Orchestra killed. They performed in their “Kung Fu pajamas” except for Marty Lush, aka Captain Lush – captain of Tikiyaki airways, who was in his Captain’s uniform. Marina the Fire Eating Mermaid performed with the Tikiyaki Orchestra. I thought it was one of her best performances. After her show Marina came and made a special point of saying “Hi” to me. If you go to see Bruce Springsteen you know who Bruce Springsteen is but Bruce doesn’t know who you are. Bruce doesn’t know his fans. Marina does. Marina is such a great entertainer and such a class act. Here's something that was funny. After the Tikiyaki Orchestra was done playing I was hanging out by the bar and this young girl in super tight white hot pants approached me. She had cleavage that was literally blinding. As in as she approached I couldn’t see anything but the cleavage. She asked if she could buy me a drink. Some guys might think, “hey, I still got it”. But I know that I never had it before and I certainly don’t have it now. She works for Kona Brewing and her job was to give out Longboard Ales as a promotion. Good marketing. The past two Hukilaus on the first night I didn’t make it much past ten o’clock. I expected about the same this year. I didn’t sleep much the night before the flight. With only a few hours sleep and the heat and the cocktails I probably would have packed it in around ten or so. But, I had made a new friend and I ended up staying out until midnight. My new friend is Joey, a mixologist from Florida. We stayed and watched the Rum Barrel competition hosted by Jeff “Beachbum” Berry and we talked the science and alchemy of cocktails. I am going to sleep good tonight.
The Tikiyaki Orchestra.
Khan Tiki Mon and his favorite mermaid.
'Cruel shoes'
2011/06/09 17:30 I made it to Ft Lauderdale. Took a cab to the hotel and got checked in. The room is really nice. The hotel is old and has seen better days but that describes me as well and I am happy with that. The room is big, has a great view, a balcony, and is close to everything I want to be close to. I went to the Bahia Mar and got registered for Hukilau. I got my Aloha pass, which this year is a nifty more permanent band than the paper wrist bands from last year. After I got registered I went to the Bahia Cabana for a couple of ice cold Landsharks and a fish sandwich. It is very very hot here and muggy. Let the fun begin.
Aloha Pass - all access pass to Hukilau 2011 - the "golden ticket".
Welcome to Hukilau 2011.
2011/06/09 08:45 It is Thursday morning and I am writing this on a plane on my way to Fort Lauderdale and my third Hukilau. There is a fair amount of turbulence. It’s kind of a bumpy ride. There is no internet connection available on this flight. When Karen and I flew home from Albuquerque the plane we were on had complimentary WiFi access to the internet. That was a first and only for me; internet connectivity while in the sky. I suspect it will be hot in Florida. I am staying at the Bahia Beach Motel this year. It is close enough to walk to the Bahia Cabana, the Bahia Mar, and the Wreck Bar and so I opted not to rent a car. I am going to try taking the shuttle bus to the Mai Kai on Saturday and so I may only have to pay for a cab from the airport to the motel and then back to the airport. I won’t have to pay to park the car and I won’t have to worry about how many Mai Tais or other rum based cocktails I should decide to consume.
2011/06/09 12:15 I am back in the sky. I changed planes in Charlotte. It was 79 degrees in Charlotte. So they say. I never left the climate controlled airport structure. There were quite a few people changing planes in Charlotte. It’s a busy airport. People hustling and bustling to get where they are going. Here’s a suggestion. If you are walking – don’t text. If you need to text then stop walking and get to the side of the concourse – for safety’s sake. It was a pretty good hike from one side of the terminal to the other side where my next plane was. By the time I got there my feet were hurting, I started to leave the house this morning wearing my comfortable deck shoes. They are apparently a little too comfortable. Karen said they were worn and ratty looking. They were a little. So I changed and put on some new deck shoes that I have never worn. I will break them in this weekend. For right now they are ‘cruel shoes’. Sometimes you have to suffer for fashion. I think they have said that on “America’s Next Top Model”. Not that I watch the show but Karen and Adison do and sometimes I overhear stuff, like “sometimes you have to suffer for fashion?” A show like “America’s Next Top Model” is definitely a show for women. You might think that a show with pretty girls would appeal to guys but these are models, who aren’t necessarily what guys find attractive, and they are all super bitchy. Not much fun. The girls that get picked to advance in the competition are never the most attractive. In fact one season the girl that won was born a dude. I guess that’s not official, I never saw her birth certificate, long or short form, but I think she might have been born a dude (I dis the show just to tease my wife and daughter). On both flights today they made the announcement that due to heightened security concerns the peasants in the back of the plane will not be allowed to use the lavatories reserved for the first class passengers. I’m not sure I understand how making us pee and poop by class structure will thwart a terrorist but I am all for being safe. If I see one of my compatriots back here in the cheap seats headed for the wrong crapper I’ll take them out myself.
Khan Tiki Mon attends his third Hukilau! Woo hoo!